Mission Impossible

On the last shopping weekend before Christmas I voluntarily put myself into the madness mix. Why? Well certainly not because I still had Christmas shopping to do. No I was done with that weeks ago, just like a good little girl.

No, I was on the search for some boots. I needed boots. Flat camel colored boots to be specific, mid-calf. Maybe ankle if I was feeling so inclined. They just couldn't go too high on the leg or else I would start to resemble a gnome. Such is the lot of a short person. I cope as well as I can.

Also, I didn't want any bells or whistles on my boots. No ornamentation or GPS tracking devices inserted in the heel. Nothing fancy. Just a simple dang pair of boots, that matched my precise requirements. This should not have been hard right?

Well apparently these boots do not exist anywhere on Earth except for in my imagination because these boots of mine were no where to be found. Not even in the finest of stores. My sister can attest to this fact seeing as how she was with me, and had to deal with my outbursts of chagrin.

So I learned a lesson, a lesson I had learned in years past, but forgot that I had already learned it. The lesson being: If I'm ever looking for something on purpose I will never find it. However if I'm looking with no particular object in mind I will most assuredly have magical finds. How silly of me to forget this. I should have been looking for ear muffs instead because I don't want ear muffs, and as a result I would have unexpectedly  found boots. I'm a firm believer in reverse psychological. The universe uses it on me all the time.

Well after spending HOURS looking for shoes and going into a two story Forever 21, and coming to terms with the state of my stretch marks, I tried to drown my sorrows in hot chocolate. But if you can even believe it the hot chocolate was disgusting. I never thought I'd live to see the day where I said such a thing but the hot chocolate HAD TO BE THROWN AWAY. A travesty indeed.

And to put a lovely little cap on things, I discovered that my black shoes, the shoes I was wearing at that precise shopping moment, the shoes wherein I wear when black shoes are necessary, as is a little height,  yes these shoes were in dire straits. Behold the magnitude of the situation:

Steve Madden?! What happened there?



Well I guess if I'm being honest with my near thirty self, I've had those shoes since my college years, and I've rolled my ankle many a time while wearing them. Fond memories for sure. But still . . . it appears that now I need to find the ever elusive pair of camel boots plus a black pair to boot. (Ha!) Because what shall I do when nothing besides black will do and the camel/taupe/tan/brown is nowhere to be found?

What shall I do?!